Friday, August 5, 2011

Novel Friday can F@!# off.

I've noticed that no one actually gives a shit about my other blog where I'm currently letting you read my unpublished novel for free, so I'm no longer going to be posting updates on this blog. If you want to read it I'll put a link up top. I'll do a little plug whenever I update it, but other than that you get nothing. Ungrateful little twerps. (PS. There will be a new chapter up today)

Why am I so irritable on this nice sunny Friday? I'm going to say a mixture of things. 

First, I think I managed to offend one of my followers, they left me. It's their fault for reading past the fucking warning. 

Second, I slept like shit, and this coffee isn't doing the trick. 

Third, my second job isn't putting as much money into my pocket as I was hoping it was going to. Fucking people need to learn to tip better. 

Forth, for those of you that weren't on twitter last night, or that don't follow me on there (shame on you) I went out with Ride Home girl last night for drinks. More on this later. 

Fifth, the weather forecast for the weekend went from "Wahoo, sunshine!" to "What the fuck is a funnel cloud doing over downtown?" 

Sixth, I still have a very long day ahead of me. 

I suppose I do have some things to be happy about. WTFW, or for those of you that just plain suck at acronyms, "What the Fuck Wednesday" was a success. It is officially my most popular post. 

Tomorrow I don't have to work. 

The last reason to be slightly happy today is I still have my legs and they still work. Yay for being able to walk. Go Me. 

So I know some of you are dying to find out what happened last night with Ride Home girl. I'm afraid to say that nothing, abso-fucking-lutely nothing. 

She tells me that she is getting people to go out for drinks because it is her last day. I waited around for her to be off work so that I could either give her a ride home or go out for drinks with her. 

We go out for drinks. Sounds all crazy romantic right? It wasn't. There was Me, three other guys, and her. I mean I've never run a train on a girl before, and I don't plan on it, so this wasn't shaping up to be much of anything. 

We are at the first bar, one of the guys didn't bring his ID so he gets kicked out, we follow, even though I knew that no matter where we went he was going to get ID'd and even said as much. Second bar, same thing. Finally after much diliberation, FINALLY, everyone decides that we should go to a restaurant so that even if they ID him he can just not order alcohol. We go to this nice quaint little family restaurant that did last call at 11. Exciting stuff. I had time for one beer. 

So everyone is slowly starting to leave and Ride Home girl says, "Hero, Can you take me home?" 

Of course I can, and I do. However on the ride home she informs me that her and another one of the guys, that doesn't have a day job, are going to go out clubbing and have a dance or 12. Great. 

I drop her off outside her apartment and get out and give her a hug. She leaves for California tomorrow to go to school. She tells me that she isn't going to go out tonight but has to pack. 

I go home. The end. 

A rather anti-climatic ending to the Ride Home girl saga. What a disappointing story, where surprise surprise, I am Not the Hero yet again.

Later Days,

(What the fuck is up with my mood today, I'm so irritable it is pissing me off)


  1. (What the fuck is up with my mood today, I'm so irritable it is pissing me off) - Best line ever.

    Fuck ride home girl, go get some willing pussy.

  2. First, you should take that as a badge of honor. I try to offend my followers. Put that on a t-shirt.
    Second, meth. Or work-nap.
    Third, high-end prostitution pays well, from what I hear. Just check out the documentary "Deuce Bigelow, Male Gigolo" for more information.
    Fourth, dumb little bitch. More on this later.
    Fifth, I know the feeling. They really need to figure out this whole "weather prediction" thing.
    Sixth, blowjobs pass the time.

    And I kinda want to punch the 19 year old in her stupid vagina for even associating with someone who forgot an ID. What a fucking retard.

  3. *Cracks knuckles* She's headed to California eh?

    Better luck next time.

  4. Nothing worse than expectations that get a no-go call after effort has been put in. Sorry for the cock block with ride home girl. On to the next!

  5. I lose followers all the time. Their loss, not mine. And I agree with Maxwell. Put that on a fucking t-shirt because you're awesome.

    The only solutions I have for irritable moods are porn and pictures of kittens sucking their paws. Your call.

  6. How cute is it that you've never "run a train on a girl" before. You're so fucking cute!

  7. *i haven't read your recent posts because I like to read in order*

    Maybe I'm a bit of an egomaniac in assuming that you're accusing me (rather wrongly D:) of leaving you. If it is to me, just so you know, I've been MIA in blogger for a LONG time. So... me not being here to comment has nothing to do with that fat post. If it IS NOT a shout out to me, then I'm sorry for thinking the world revolves around me.

    Either way, one meager follower shouldn't make you so distraught. I noticed in the blogs I follow that the more concerned a writer gets with grabbing/retaining followers, the less enjoyable the posts are. Of course, that's a correlation and is not necessarily true for you. Take it as a concern.

    Second of all (keep in mind I'm assuming you were being sarcastic about the passive aggressiveness on your lack of readership), you shouldn't get offended when you don't get rave reviews (and tons of them) when you post a novel for free on blogger. Personally, I don't think I'm the audience you're trying to capture with that genre/storyline. Please don't take that as an insult or a critique. I rarely read fiction anyway... it has nothing to do with your ability as a writer.

    And I'm sorry I can't sympathize with your lovelorn situation. I mean, I kinda wanna chide you for investing in her (she sounds trashy and not worth the time to begin with). Oh well, you can't come to the table expecting cake every day.


My frail ego requires validation.