Oh Hi there. Where have you been all my life? What do you mean you've been here waiting patiently for me to post some funny anecdote or tell you about what is going on in my life?
I have been gone for a while. This is the single longest break from posting I've ever taken. It isn't that I don't love you because I do. It is strictly lack of inspiration and a lack of excitement in my life.
I have done abso-fucking-lutely nothing this last week and a half. That is a lie. I've done what I always do. On the weekends I go out with friends, drink my face off and waste the rest of the weekend recovering from the hangovers. During the week I work and blop my ever growing ass on a couch and watch a movie.
This isn't working for me anymore. So this weekend I hatched a new plan or challenge if you will. I needed some help though.
This challenge is going to be called "Move it fat ass or you get bic'd!" the title is still a work in progress.
What does this entail?
I got everyone of my friends involved in this except Vegas because, well, he is already in pretty near perfect shape. Fucker!
So Token, Ginger, Junior, and I are all going to be participating.
We have agreed that until the challenge is over there will be no use/abuse of vices. This for me means no drinking. That is right, until the challenge is over I will not be participating in any more shenanigans.
So what is the challenge?
We are all going to set a personal fitness goal that we all agree is achievable in roughly the same amount of time as each others' goals.
I'm going to try and lose 15 pounds. Everyone else has their own goals and it isn't my place to tell you them.
I've been trying to stay in shape for a while, (my entire life) and it just hasn't stuck. I'd be doing fine all week then the weekend would come and I'd crack my first of many beer and then light up a cigarette. I'd then spend the rest of the week recovering from my shenanigans. So How am I going to fix this? What is the motivation to stick to the goal and actually achieve it? Well out of the four of us doing the challenge the last person to complete their goal gets their head shaved, all the way down, with a razor.
I plan on going to my younger sisters university every morning before work. I'll be swimming laps and going to the gym. Alternating days for each. I'm also going to start rock climbing again after work. My sisters are already helping me adjust my diet to allow for maximum results.
I'm excited to do this and even more excited that my friends are going to be doing it as well. It will make actually doing it easier if I have no one to distract me with partying.
Hopefully with the new environments and such I'll be able to find new inspiration to write amusing things.
Wish me luck everyone.