Wednesday, December 14, 2011

What the Fuck Wednesday: Picky Eaters.

Welcome to this weeks edition of WTFW. I'm going to be talking about picky eaters.

There is only one thing I absolutely cannot eat, and that is Coconut. I'm allergic to it. 

There is another thing I don't like to eat, and that would be cooked green beans. Raw green beans I can't get enough of, but the moment you cook them I can't stand em. Weird I know but I'm pretty sure it is a texture thing. 

My mother is a notoriously terrible cook. I never realized this growing up because, well, exposure to food that wasn't cooked by my mother was limited. She would almost cook the green beans to mush, then add butter to them. So I was forced to eat slimy, mushy, green beans. When I mean forced, I mean forced. I wasn't allowed to leave the table till I ate them. When I was about 12 years old I dug in my heals and slept at the kitchen table. I didn't have to eat them after that. 

However, this being said, now that I'm older. If I'm out for dinner and green beans are served I will eat them. I won't enjoy them, but I will eat them. 

One of the things I discovered when I moved away from home was the fantastic foods I'd been missing out on my whole life. Different ethnic foods that I hadn't previously been exposed to are fantastic and that brings me to my point. 

I have dated a couple of picky eaters in my life and deep down inside it bothered me. 

The Doctor is the most recent example of it, partly because of an allergy but I can forgive her for that. She didn't like vegetables and was allergic to wheat. This meant she would eat lettuce, meat, and gluten free carbohydrates. This meant that eating out with her turned into an adventure, never mind trying to cook her a meal. One of my favorite things to do with a girl I'm dating. 

Then there is Junior, he doesn't like vegetables either. So trying to cook a meal for the two of us doesn't work well either. How can you hate an entire food group? Carrots don't taste the same as a green pepper, or brussel sprouts so saying "Oh, I don't like vegetables." is ignorant as fuck.

I grew up with a picky eater as well, my older sister is remarkably picky. Not so much now that she is older and isn't eating my mothers terrible cooking but still picky. 

I don't know what exactly it is that bothers me about picky eaters. Maybe it is the fact that there are people in the world that would kill to eat some of the things that these people flat out refuse to eat and end up throwing out. It could be a symbol for other things in life. If you are picky about what you eat are you just as picky when it comes to things your willing to experience. It could be that I worked at a chef for years and hated modified orders. If you don't like something in the meal don't order it.

When it comes to dating women, I don't think I could date a picky eater. I'm not saying one or two things that they don't like but when there is a list of things, I begin to have an issue with it. What the Fuck is wrong with trying new things? You've got one life to live so why not experience it. This goes for eating new things, trying new activities, and trying new things in the bed room. Without an adventurous attitude I'm afraid life is just too boring for me. So if the woman I'm dating isn't adventurous either, I'm afraid that I'm going to find her boring as well. 

So shut the fuck up, eat the meal the way it is prepared, stop worrying about what you don't like and start worrying about the things you haven't experienced yet. If that doesn't work think about this kid next time you stick your tongue out and make a face at what is placed in front of you.

Son I am disappoint!

Later Days and happy eating,


  1. I couldn't agree more. Being picky about food for no valid reason is indeed a way of denying yourself a new experience and that's sad. Plus, food is one of the biggest pleasures in life, so I really don't get it.
    And I'm a real ogre when I'm hungry and have no patience to think about what and where to eat for an hour on an empty stomach, so picky eaters can be even more of a pain...
    PS: Who doesn't eat ANY vegetables anyway?!?

  2. I definitely agree with this one. When I try new foods and there are options and extras to be added, my answer is always "Whatever should be on there, put it on".

  3. I'm afraid we could never date and that suddenly makes me sad. I'm not a "picky eater" necessarily I just don't like a couple foods that most men love. I haven't eaten any form of beef or pork in over 11 years. Just don't like it. I hate steak and filet so why eat a cheeseburger when I can have a turkey burger instead? I will try new foods but I don't eat beef or pork and somehow that makes men freak the fuck out. Oh well.

    I get not liking a food but what I don't get and cannot tolerate is people who won't even try the food and just say "I won't like it"...shut up and try it!

  4. I should clarify that Dietary changes such as vegetarian don't bother me. So Jewels, your choice to not eat beef or pork doesn't bother me either, it doesn't really effect your daily life.

  5. I love food, but have to be *look* "picky". I'm allergic to milk. Coming up with substitutes for that in which is in a lot of food are just as adventurous :) haha.


  6. ....haha, meant to put *are* for *is* and *is* for *are*... apparently, I type good English today :P


  7. I don't like bitter foods. But anything else is fair game, except for the deadly avocado allergy. But I can find something at any restaurant. People who are 'picky' are usually just attention -seeking and annoying as fuck. You are wise to avoid them.

  8. I agree with Belliza. I love food, which is why I can't stand my mom with all her dieting. And then she makes fun of me because I won't starve/deprive myself. Life is too short to not atleast try different foods.

  9. Fun fact, did you know there are trace amounts of gluten in semen? If she's gluten intolerant, a bj could make her ill...

    *cue music* The more you know....

  10. does requesting a breakfast sandwich at mcdonalds as "freshly cooked" qualify as being picky? Because my roommate scowls at me whenever I do this. In my defense, I don't like eating a biscuit that has been sitting out for 4 hours and has the consistency of construction paper.


My frail ego requires validation.