Monday, March 19, 2012

My Weekend Monday: St. Drunk off my ass day.

That awkward moment when you run into someone you were supposed to hang out with but have kept blowing them off for the last month. Yea, this is kinda what that feels like. 

I'm sorry. I don't really have an excuse. Other than the fact that my life has been relatively boring lately. I gave up drinking which helped out a lot on that aspect. I have also been broke lately which didn't help with the excitement part either.

This isn't to say that I haven't had some excitement. Last weekend I went snowboarding and rode the park. My tailbone is still sore from falling. I was so sore after last Sunday I was in bed by 830 and still almost slept in for work the next morning.

That would have made for a good post if I had brought a decent camera, but I didn't. 

Wednesday I went out for 1.50 tacos. Which may sound like a really good idea but the night sweats and... well you get the idea, were not worth it. 

So St. Patty's day was this last weekend and I don't know if you knew this but it is an awesome holiday. 

We started first thing in the morning. 10 am for irish breakfast. Blood sausage, eggs, and potato pancakes with gravy and a side of Guinness. Which was followed by more Guinness. We played darts and pool. We had Irish stew for lunch. Then the day started to get messy. 

By 6 pm I'd already had close to 20 drinks and I could still feel my face. 

By 9 pm I could barely feel my face but I found a girl by this point and was more pointedly feeling other things. 

By midnight we were walking out of the bar looking for a cab to take me and her back to her place. I thought maybe she had pissed herself but it was just spilled beer, and then she pissed in the parking lot of a Safeway.

In the middle of a downtown grocery store she popped a squat and let the river flow. I manage to find the classy ones I tell ya. 

Eventually a friend of hers came and picked us up and took us back to her place. Where we had just what I needed, more beer. 

By 2 am we were in her bed and having naked sexy times. I was hammered but my performance was still decent. It was good sex just wasn't fantastic. I was too drunk to finish but we made a deal to try again in the morning. 

In the morning we tried again. After about ten minutes I say, " Oh wow, my head is pounding,." She responds with "That is because you were just pounding me." 


We start watching hockey and have a bit of a nap and drink some water. 

In the afternoon we tried one more time. 

It worked YAY!!!!

We then got up and she drove me back to my car where I got her number, and realized I don't think I ever got her name. 

Now who's the classy one. This guy. 

The good news is I texted her "hey this is NtH" and she responded with her name. 

The bad news is I am not planning on seeing her ever again. I have learned that random drunken hook ups are just that. 

Anyway, I'm still suffering a bit of a hang over and need to work.
Later Days,


  1. I don't think I've ever had a one-night stand give me three attempts to get it right.... Bravo, good sir.

  2. Wow, you go big, and then you go home, with a classy chick! Go you! Glad the 3rd time was a charm. But I totally agree with you, that unless the sex was spectacular, follow up with this one is probably not a good use of your time.

  3. Way to celebrate! :) Our St. P's day was decidedly less exciting. Turns out we just celebrated on Sunday instead...

  4. Wow, sounds like an awesome St. patty's celebration.

    At first I thought she pissed IN the store. That would have been hilarious.

  5. wouldn't it be funny if i was like, "hey, that was me!" lol

  6. oh, and if my twatter thingy didn't work, come and see me at to the point or send me a text (403)620-8961, for your tattoo. and thanks so much for the henry rollins tip a few weeks ago. without you, i wouldn't have known!


My frail ego requires validation.